Call me a safe bet. I'm betting I'm not.

via todayisanewchance · originally by skypestripper
via lepetitprince21 · originally by kalories1
via faolan228 · originally by likebuyashovel
via hints-of-sarcasm · originally by daisydukesx

scratchingpad:

Kitten calls for backup

via faolan228 · originally by scratchingpad
"There’s no story here.
I let you flirt with me
because I’m lonely.
I let the dinner party go on
as long as I can and then I pull the tablecloth out from underneath
us until I’m the only
dish that hasn’t fallen to the floor.

I don’t think I have it in me,
the fairy tale you’re talking about.
The one where I call you back
and sound like the princess,
all hopeless and helpless in love.
Most times I’m satisfied
with just being wanted,
because I’m still my own and
you still can’t stand it and God,
it tastes good,
the air on the way back to my place, alone as ever.

Give me a feeling. Any feeling.
I’ll chew it up and spit out
something pretty,
tie the tenderness with my tongue
and hand the cherry stem to you,
all mangled and gorgeous.

I talk so much for someone who
has nothing to say.

Yeah, I’m full of it.
Yeah, I’ve already thought about
fucking you in every single
place we’ve walked by and no,
I’m not gonna do anything about it.
But I will call you at three in the
morning and kiss you
until you’re sure something
else is going to happen,
then I’ll say goodnight, belly full
of satisfied.

I’m actually vicious.
A sliver of me is stone and that’s the
only place I let you touch because
it’s the only place that won’t
remember you.

So, okay, maybe there’s a story here.
Maybe it’s not the one I thought
it was,
but at least it’s something."
Caitlyn Siehl, Something Pretty (via alonesomes)
via mylittle-dec0y · originally by alonesomes

weirdpalegirl:

lisbethsplayground:

Happy birthday Alyson!

*noms*

via faolan228 · originally by lisbethsplayground

seeingbloodorange:

Remind me again why Buffy isn’t the number one fandom on tumblr.

  • Period: You want cookies
  • Period: You want to fuck
  • Period: You want to fuck while eating cookies.
  • Period: Let's be sad about trivial things, shall we?
  • Period: Kill them.
  • Period: Kill them too.
  • Period: Kill them and eat their cookies.
  • Period: Shhhh it's okay you'll feel better soon.
  • Period: HAHAHAHAHA NO YOU WON'T FUCK YOU.
  • Period: Whoops you dropped a spoon better cry
via zombiehippos · originally by pensiveoffensive

andrewpauldost:

what if u had an identical twin that did porn and u like went to the grocery and theyre like “omg i saw u take 3 dicks at once while wearing a turtle costume” and ur like “god dammit gary”

via bluecowsmoo · originally by grossr5